Really, there are no words. So all I am going to tell you is this. Some dude, let's call him Dario Sattui as that's what it says in the brochure, decides 30 years ago that Nappa Valley wasn't beautiful enough au naturel and gave it this back-yard Hollywood face-lift in the form of a reproduction Tuscan castle:
which is the countryside equivalent of the face of the Bride of Wildenstein.
Yes, absolutely, I knew you would see the rassemblance.
Anyway, in order to treat this project like the banged out back street whore that it is, they also have a gift shop:
I have no more to say on this matter.